True Confessions: I Colored My Gray

As many of you know I'm "pro-gray". I always admire how gray hair looks on other people. To my eyes it doesn't look "old" but modern and sort of sci-fi. I think gray hair is totally punk rock yet I wasn't ready to go fully gray so I thought I'd try out a streak or two. I'm probably about 30% gray, white actually. So for the past few months I've been letting my grays out of the closet. I just felt with my dark curly hair and bone structure I was starting to resemble the Bride of Frankenstein. I just didn't feel like a carried it off as well as gorgeous models Yasmina Rossi or Kristen McMenamy. I had a rough childhood with a lot of name calling. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I am not ugly.

So I was debating whether or not to color it. Ironically, since going gray I've been asked out more than when I was 100% dark brown. Author and Journalist Anne Kreamer wrote about this phenomenon in her book Going Gray: What I Learned About Beauty, Sex, Work, Motherhood, Authenticity, and Everything Else That Really Matters. The book features her interesting experiment as an on-line dater. Kreamer placed two online personal ads with photos on Match.com: one with gray hair, one with brown. The gray one got three times the response.

Then again Kreamer also talked to headhunters, who told her that gray hair on female job seekers was a career killer. Which brings me to my next point. Cindy Joseph, one of my favorite silver-haired models recently went blonde for an ad campaign. I certainly don't blame her. It can't be easy being a gray haired model among a sea of teenagers during a recession. Although Cindy informs me, "The truth is, its actually easier to be a Boomer aged model in this industry. Being a silvered haired model among the sea of teenage models is wonderful. Young models feel much more pressure to be thinner, taller hipper etc. There is more competition for them. I was happy Nivea wanted a Boomer aged model. No question, I would have preferred they kept my hair silver. However, this is not my first rodeo. I know they are driven by statistics. However, I am comforted that 20 years ago a women my age would have never modeled for a beauty campaign. Times ARE changing! Pro-Age progress IS being made. Give them some time, they will get it. And if each of us keep celebrating our age, without hiding it, the world will see that life is passionate, fun, and beautiful all the way through!"

I think Cindy is beautiful regardless of hair color. Although with her new blonde hair I feel like I am seeing her through funky tinted sunglasses. I personally don't think it makes her look any younger but Nivea, the company that has just employed her, apparently does.

I certainly don't want to look older than I am. The part of me that is a holistic health coach and positive body image supporter wanted to rock the gray. The other part of me that is also an artist and bon vivant loves color and experimenting. I was reading up on some hair color forums and one woman confessed her own love of artificial color as she put it: BETTER LIVING THROUGH CHEMICALS. Maybe she's right? How far do I want to take this natural living stuff? I mean I still like being a girl and shaving my legs and all. It's fun to change your look. I have had black hair, brown hair, red hair and various shades of blonde and red highlights. I've also worn tints of plum, violet and even blue when I was younger to achieve that superman blue-black hue. Actually, my dream hair color would be Nicole Kidman's red locks from Moulin Rouge or the bright red of Disney's Little Mermaid Ariel. I love trends. Right now I covet those new feather extensions!

What was at the heart of my decision? My own intentions? The intentions of those who think gray hair that looks old. Or was I feeling the need to please my new pro-gray friends. I always want to be one of the cool kids. So I thought if I dyed it and missed it I'd know the answer. So I dyed my hair with my old stand-by Naturtint No. 5N Light Chestnut. I have to say a few minutes later it really hit me: it doesn't matter what color my hair is as long as I feel good about me. There will always be those people who don't like the way I look or just plain don't like me. What's my design for me? What matters is how I feel and how I make others feel. A part of me was actually looking forward to showing off a tan with my silver-streaked hair. I have a new orange dress that would look smashing with it. As I have said before I don't think everyone has to be gray but can it at least be an option and a beautiful one at that.